Emotions cannot be rationalized. They are simply your natural response to a stimulus, an organic reaction. However, have you noticed how much of this response is because of your own emotions, and how much of it is due to others?
The problem of lack of ownership of feelings
Most of us let our emotions be ruled by our circumstances, especially the people around us. We let them dictate our mood and the way we feel.
However, when you give others so much control, it puts you in a vulnerable spot. It not only sets you up for getting exploited, but you might also then shirk from your responsibilities, shifting the blame to others instead of being accountable for your own action.
Furthermore, when you are not taking ownership of your emotions, you also become dependent on others for feeling the good emotions, and there is no reason why you should be depriving yourself happiness. However, at times, lack of the way you feel, especially sad emotions, might be due to mental health issues like depression, that then require treatment from the Best Psychiatrist in Karachi.
Benefits of taking ownership of your feelings
Makes you in charge: When you take charge of how you will, no matter what the circumstances, you empower yourself. You let your feelings be independent of others, so they become more authentic.
Listen to your own self: Taking ownership also helps you attune better to your true feelings, as supposed to what you are made to feel.
Take responsibility: It also makes you a more responsible person, as instead of shifting the blame to others, you take accountability of your own actions.
Not reliant on others: If your emotions are contingent on others, then to have issues resolve and the consequent mental peace, you might then turn to others. Of course, people will not always cater to this emotional need of yours, leaving the scab open. This way, you might never get closure.
On the other hand, if you take ownership of your feelings, you don’t rely on others for resolution of those feelings.
How to take ownership of your feelings?
Identify your feelings
For to take ownership, you first need to identify your feelings. Sometimes, our natural response is different, but when people influence our feelings, we are made to feel a certain way.
For example, you might not find a joke funny, but when others are laughing around you, you may be pressured into laughing. This is a very basic way people can make you change your feelings. What you need to do is listen to your natural response and identify it. Understand why you felt this way. And be okay with it.
Identify the ways you shift blame
At times, we tend to shift the blame of the way we feel to others. This shirking can prevent you from taking ownership of your feelings.
So, identify the ways you shift blame to others and resolve them. For example, most people blame their parents for the way they feel, and after some point, they need to have their childhood issues resolved.
Stop making excuses
Stop making excuses for the way you feel. You are an adult and are responsible for your actions.
Name your emotions
Naming your emotions can help you in coming to terms with it. It also then helps you be more aligned with your inner self.
Understand where your emotions are coming from
It’s important to understand where your emotions are coming from; is it a response to the present situation or is it because of some previous unresolved tension. When you understand your pattern of emotions, you can then regulate it better as well.
Seek expert help
If you are finding it hard to take ownership of your feelings, you may benefit from seeking help from a mental health expert like the Best Psychiatrist in Rawalpindi.