Sometimes you get to a point in a relationship where you realize that you love the person you are with, but that love that you started out with is losing its intensity. While there is no one right way to break up with someone you love, there are some tips you can apply to make things easier for each of you.
Method 1. Stand ready to break up with someone
1. Make sure you want to break up with someone for good.
Never break up with someone you love unless you are sure you will never get on with that person again. Even if you change your mind after the break-up and agree to reconnect with your ex, you will have already taken a toll on your relationship.
2. Don’t be in a rush to strike up a friendship with your future ex-partner.
Expect him to be too hurt around the time of the break up to pretend to remain your friend. Breaking up can be very upsetting for anyone who gets involved in a relationship. Do not expect to quickly make friends with your ex-partner after the break-up.
3. Avoid breaking up for the wrong reasons.
First of all, try to find out if your relationship is in trouble. You need to think about the future, not just your own, but your spouse’s as well.
- Don’t stay with someone because you’re afraid of being alone. The only way to find your soulmate is to get out of that relationship and be free.
- Don’t choose to stay with someone because you’re afraid of hurting their feelings. Breaking up may seem cruel, but continuing to stay with someone you are not in love with is still very bad.
- Don’t offer breaks. Breaks are just a road to break up with someone you love. If you feel like your relationship needs a break, chances are you feel like breaking up, but scared to be alone. Instead of asking for a break, wait until you’re ready to end the relationship and then do it.
4. Take the necessary precautions.
If you live together, decide who will go and who will stay (of course, you need to be available to chat with your partner). If you want your partner to leave, you will need to give them time to find a new apartment and a place to stay during this time.
- Ask your parents or close friends if you can stay at their place for a few days or pay for a hotel room for a few nights.
- If you don’t live together, but see each other frequently at your workplace, you will need to think about readjusting your schedule. If you think seeing each other regularly will cause problems, consider changing jobs or rearranging your schedule to avoid constantly crossing over.
Method 2. Announce the news to break up with someone
1. Pick the right time.
There isn’t a good time to break up with someone you love, but there are some situations you should avoid, including the following.
- Avoid bringing up the subject when your boyfriend is going through a personal crisis such as a death affecting his family, being diagnosed with an illness, or losing a job. If he’s going through a time of crisis, allow time to pass before breaking up to avoid making the situation worse.
- Avoid bringing up the subject in the middle of an argument. Never break up with someone who doesn’t love you in anger. You may say things that you don’t really mean, and you may regret that decision when you are done making your case.
- Avoid bringing up the subject in front of other people. If you choose to break up with him in public, at least make sure you find a quiet place to have a conversation. Remember, you can both be very emotional and will need some privacy right now.
- Avoid breaking up by text, email or phone. If you really consider him, you will need to allow him to have a face-to-face discussion with you.
- The only exception to this rule is that you can do this if you are in a long-distance relationship and it is impossible to see you. Even then, try to do it over Skype or over the phone, instead of breaking up through social media or email.
2. Prepare your partner for the conversation.
In other words, don’t surprise him by revealing the news in the middle of the conversation or while he’s busy with something else.
- Let him know by saying to yourself, “I want to talk to you about something” or “I think we need to talk.”
- You can send an email or text message to your partner to discuss your relationship. This will give her enough time to prepare emotionally for this important discussion. If you don’t want to break up with someone over text, let him know beforehand that you plan to have a serious conversation with him.
3. Use the personal pronoun “I” in your sentences.
This allows you to avoid any confusion and to put your opinion to the fore considerably. Follow the following examples.
- “I really believe that children are not part of my plans for the future. It’s a way of saying you don’t want to have kids.
- “I think I have to take more of myself now. It’s a good way to say that you want to spend more time alone.
- “I have to think about my future. It’s a way of saying that your relationship is going nowhere.
4. Be honest, but not obnoxious.
Each person deserves to be told the truth, but there are also things that can hurt your partner’s feelings, without having any constructive reason for the break up with someone you love.
- If there is something seriously wrong with your relationship like having different interests, you should discuss it with your boyfriend. Being honest and putting any mystery aside can help your partner move forward rather than constantly wondering why you ended the relationship and what they could have done that was different. You could say something like this, “I know you really like going out all the time, but I don’t really like it.” I don’t think we will continue to be happy with this incompatibility. “
- Find a better way to communicate your complaints to him. If you love him, you must make an effort to protect his esteem. For example, instead of saying “I don’t find you attractive anymore”, say something like, “There is no more chemistry between us”.
- Reassure your partner by telling him that you still love him and that you really care. It will kind of alleviate some of his feelings of rejection. You could say something like this, “I think you’re a really good person. You are very intelligent and you have a lot of ambitions. I just think my ambitions are different.”
5. Ask him to remain good friends.
If you really want to be friends with your ex, you should let them know after the break up with someone who doesn’t love you. Also, be prepared for the fact that this proposal could hurt him, especially at the beginning. Respect their needs and give them space if necessary.
- Don’t regularly call your ex-partner after the break-up. It might make him believe something else and he might have a hard time moving forward under these conditions. Even if you have decided to remain friends, you need to spend some time without each other after the break up with someone who doesn’t like you, during which time you won’t have to see or talk to each other.
- After the time has passed and her feelings aren’t as strong as they used to be, consider seeing your ex again. You could organize a group outing and invite her (it might be good to avoid dates between the two of you to avoid sending confused signals to her). You could try saying something like this, “Hi, some friends and I are going to see this new movie. Would you like to come with us? “
Method 3. Turn the page after the break up with someone
1. Avoid talking to your ex-boyfriend, at least right after the break-up.
While it may seem impossible to cut off all contact with someone you love, staying in touch with that person constantly will be more painful for you. If you feel tempted to do this, block your partner’s contact on your phone. Block their username on social media. Thus, you will be able to better manage your temptation
2. Don’t feel guilty about feeling sad.
Even if the decision to break up is up to you, you may still feel hurt or lost. These feelings are normal and you will need to come to terms with them in order to get over your situation.
3. Give yourself time.
Love can be complicated. After a separation, you may feel like you’ve lost something. This would mean that you need to take some time to get to know yourself and to be alone before entering into another relationship.
4. Rely on friends and family.
Don’t let it scare you to seek emotional support in your life. This support could come from your close friends and family. They are very likely to be more understanding with you and offer you help or advice.
Read Trending contents on EVOKING MINDS